Quote of the day:
“Patience strengthens the spirit, sweetens the temper, stifles anger, extinguishes envy, subdues pride, bridles the tongue, restrains the hand, and tramples upon temptations.” —George Horne Reflection: I don’t know if it is just me, or if anyone else is noticing that more and more people these days seem to be angry and have really short fuses. This got me to thinking about the words longsuffering and patience. When I looked into the Greek word makrothumia, the word translated as “longsuffering” or patient I saw that there was another facet. Makro means “long” (no revelation there), and thumia means temper, which was eye-opening. So a more precise translation of makrothumia may be long-tempered, the opposite of short-tempered. At a conference a while back, one of the speakers had said that spontaneously flying off the handle is now referred to as Intermittent Explosive Disorder (IED). If sudden short-temperedness is now regarded as a mental disorder, then it makes sense that long-temperedness would be a sign of mental well-being. The speaker went on to say that IED is reaching alarming proportions, so I’m not the only one noticing this. All that to say it might behoove us to check our mental health by how long-tempered or patient we are.
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Quote of the day:
"Let us be grateful to people who make us happy; they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom.” — Marcel Proust Reflection: The Japanese have a wonderful custom that when they meet again, they thank the person for the last experience: “Konaidawa, domo arigato gozaimasu,” which means, “Thank you for the last time.” In Iceland they have a similar saying, “Takk fyrir siðast” which is a common greeting. It also means “Thank you for last time,” and people say it in the same breath as “Hello”. Even if there wasn’t a particularly meaningful exchange the last time the two met, saying this puts the current conversation within the larger framework of their long-term interactions and starts it on a positive note. I’m sure there are similar sayings in other languages and I’d be happy to know what they are if you want to send them to me. No matter what language you speak, or if you have a similar saying or not, let us be grateful to the people we meet as there are no random meetings in our lives. Everyone we touch and who touches us has been put in our path for a reason. Quote of the day:
“Anger dwells only in the bosom of fools.” — Albert Einstein Reflection: There once was a little boy who had a bad temper. His Father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper, he must hammer a nail into the back of the fence. The first day the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence. Over the next few weeks, as he learned to control his anger, the number of nails hammered daily gradually dwindled down. He discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence. Finally the day came when the boy didn't lose his temper at all. He told his father about it and the father suggested that the boy now pull out one nail for each day that he was able to hold his temper. The days passed and the young boy was finally able to tell his father that all the nails were gone. The father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence. He said, “You have done well, my son, but look at the holes in the fence. The fence will never be the same. When you say things in anger, they leave a scar just like this one. You can put a knife in a man and draw it out. But it won't matter how many times you say ‘I'm sorry’, the wound will still be there. A verbal wound is as bad as a physical one.” The next time you are tempted to lose your temper and say something you shouldn’t, remember this story, and think about the wounds you may never be able to repair. Is it worth it? Quote of the day:
"Kindness is in our power even if fondness is not.” – Samuel Johnson Reflection: A young couple had a baby who was physically perfect except for one thing. She was born with no ears. The parents of this young child were extremely worried about how difficult life would be for their offspring. They feared the ridicule that would surely occur when she was old enough to attend school. They wanted to introduce their daughter to other children before that dreaded day in order to see what the reaction would be. They asked a neighbor to bring her little girls to the house and let them look at the baby. Instead of showing up with her daughters, the neighbor showed up with her eight-year-old son who was known for his mean mouth. If someone had bad breath he wouldn't simply say it, he would fall to the floor and faint! With many reservations they introduced their daughter to the little boy and waited for a reply. He looked at her lying in the crib. Finally he asked, "Are her eyes good?" "Yes, why?" asked the concerned parents. "Because she's going to have a hard time wearing glasses.” Even the brattiest, most obnoxious person doesn't have to say something mean. Why notice everything that is wrong with people? Instead, try to see the positive side. If you look a little closer than first appearances you'll find it. Chances are they already know what's wrong. They have heard the ridicule and scorn already. Surprise them by saying something nice. Quote of the day:
“Before you speak ask yourself if what you are going to say is true, is kind, is necessary, is helpful. If the answer is no, maybe what you are about to say should be left unsaid.” — Bernard Meltzer Reflection: I think this quote has good advice, in addition to the story below, which expounds on the subject even more. In ancient Greece, Socrates was reputed to hold knowledge in high esteem. One day an acquaintance met the great philosopher and said, “Do you know what I just heard about your friend?” “Hold on a minute,” Socrates replied. “Before telling me anything I’d like you to pass a little test. It’s called the Triple Filter Test.” “Triple filter?” “That’s right,” Socrates continued. “Before you talk to me about my friend, it might be a good idea to take a moment and filter what you’re going to say. That’s why I call it the triple filter test. The first filter is truth. Have you made absolutely sure that what you are about to tell me is true?” “No,” the man said, “Actually I just heard about it and...” “All right,” said Socrates. “So you don’t really know if it’s true or not. Now let’s try the second filter, the filter of goodness. Is what you are about to tell me about my friend something good?” “No, on the contrary…” “So,” Socrates continued, “you want to tell me something bad about him, but you’re not certain it’s true. You may still pass the test though, because there’s one filter left: the filter of usefulness. Is what you want to tell me about my friend going to be useful to me?” “No, not really…” “Well,” concluded Socrates, “if what you want to tell me is neither true nor good nor even useful, why tell it to me at all?” Let’s take a lesson from these quotes and put our words through the Triple Filter Test before saying them. As you know, I’m a great advocate of building up and bringing out the best in people. In Alan Loy McGinnis book, Bringing Out the Best in People, he does an excellent job promoting this concept and gives you 12 key principles on how to do it. McGinnis arrived at these principles by studying great leaders throughout history, the most effective organizations, and many prominent psychologists. Through his research he has discovered their motivational secrets. He shares fascinating case studies and anecdotes about Lee Lacocca, Sandra Day O'Connor, Helen Keller, Mother Teresa and many others, and shows how you can put his 12 key principles to work in your family or organization. Whether you are a parent, executive, teacher, or friend, you can gain the satisfaction that comes from bringing the best out in people.
Alan provides a list of guidelines for how to motivate people to be their best and then gives great examples from people's lives. He tells us from the beginning he's approaching his subject from a Christian perspective. He argues that people have the predisposition that they do not want to be lethargic and bored, they want to be challenged. He writes, "Deep in the breast of everyone there is a drive to achieve something, to be somebody." McGinnis makes an insightful observation on listening. He says if you listen to people long enough they will tell you what motivates them. He includes a lot about encouragement and creating the proper environment to bring out the best in people. That means leaving room for failure, because as risks are taken, sometimes failure will result. Failure is temporary. This book will help you gain a greater focus if you read it and follow what it suggests. Your communication skills with other people will be enhanced. Others will respect you more as you learn to relate to them more effectively. You'll need to read it a few times to grasp all the pearls of wisdom. However, the great thing is you can start applying what you learn immediately since he explains the basic principle first and backs it up with examples thereafter. I think this quote beautifully sums up the purpose of the book. In McGinnis’ words, “I discovered that virtually everyone is a motivator in one situation or another--when we're persuading a friend to lose weight, or giving a pep talk to our kids, or trying to help a hitter out of a slump, we're motivators. Either we are doing it poorly or we are doing it well. It is the purpose of this book to pass on to you principles which will enable you to do it well. If you will incorporate them into your everyday dealings with people, I am convinced that you will find yourself getting ahead at a surprising rate. What is more important, the people around you will be very grateful. For our chief want, as Emerson said, is for someone who will inspire us to be what we know we could be.” I hope you will be interested in reading this book as it gives great tips on how to build others up. To purchase the book, click on the book store page and find the book on the drop down menu under Influence. Review by Dana Bosley
This book is a course in re-discovering your creative self. You don’t have to be an artist, dancer, singer, writer or any other kind of person you associate with art. The thing I found helpful with this book is that it set me free to create a beautiful life. My life is my very own master piece and all the exercises and commentary she discusses in her book I was able to apply to my personal master piece, and you can too. The entire course is based upon the principle that the artist must have faith to be creative. It is the author's conviction that the Creator encourages creativity in all people. With the basic principle that creative expression is the natural direction of life, Julia Cameron and Mark Bryan lead you through a comprehensive twelve week program to discover your creativity from a variety of blocks, including limiting beliefs, fear, self-sabotage, jealousy, guilt, addictions, and other inhibiting forces, and replacing them with confidence and productivity. Julia recommends two ongoing activities that will conquer blocks of self-destructive tendencies: Morning Pages and Artist's Dates. Morning Pages are three pages of writing, performed daily, about anything at all. This exercise overcomes the writer's internal censor or as I call it, negative self-chatter. The Artist's Date is a weekly block of time of two hours spent observing, experiencing, and sensing. The book is broken down into twelve weekly lessons. There are several miscellaneous sections. Each weekly lesson has tasks and exercises to be completed. Sidebars provide quotes and tidbits of information to uplift the soul. The divisions of the manual are as follow: · Introduction: The author explains how she began teaching and eventually developed her seminars and lectures into a book. · Spiritual Electricity: The Basic Principles defines the ten spiritual principles, gives directions for using this course, and tells the reader what to expect from the course. · The Basic Tools: Introduces the two primary tools of the course: The Morning Pages and the Artist Date. · Week 1: Recovering a Sense of Safety deals with realizing what negative beliefs and hurts from the past are blocking or restricting your creativity and replacing them with positive affirmations. · Week 2: Recovering a Sense of Identity begins with a section called "Going Sane." It deals with the people you surround yourself with in life and how they exert negative influence over your creativity. · Week 3: Recovering a Sense of Power leaps right into anger management, shame, and dealing with criticism. · Week 4: Recovering a Sense of Integrity, the essays, tasks, and exercises are designed to catapult you into productive introspection and integration of new self-awareness. · Week 5: Recovering a Sense of Possibility explores how you curtail your own possibilities by placing limits on the good you can receive and examines the cost of settling for appearing good instead of being authentic. · Week 6: Recovering a Sense of Abundance tackles a major creative block—money. · Week 7: Recovering a Sense of Connection aims at excavating areas of creative interest as you connect with your personal dreams. · Week 8: Recovering a Sense of Strength tackles another major creative block—time. · Week 9: Recovering a Sense of Compassion explores and acknowledges the emotional difficulties that beset us in the past and undertakes healing the shame of past failures. · Week 10: Recovering a Sense of Self-Protection explores the perils that can ambush us on our path. · Week 11: Recovering a Sense of Autonomy examines the ongoing ways in which we must nurture and accept ourselves, explores the behaviors that can strengthen our spiritual base and, therefore, our creative power. This week takes a special look at the ways in which success must be handled in order that we not sabotage our freedom. · Week 12: Recovering a Sense of Faith acknowledges the inherently mysterious spiritual heart of creativity. It addresses the fact that creativity requires receptivity and profound trust—capacities that have been developed through the work in this course and takes a special look at last-minute sabotages. If you are in doubt and you need just that little bit of encouragement, if you know deep down inside that there is an artist in you that feels neglected, or that you haven't yet discovered, take the plunge and start a wonderful journey! If you are a lawyer, accountant or a mother taking care of your family at home, or any other profession, don't be discouraged or misled by the book's title—this book is for you! Let it help you create a beautiful life like it did for me. If you are interested in this book you can go to the Book Store page and find it in the drop down menu called self-improvement. Review by Coach Dana Bosley
(Personal Development Coach) Over the years I have read this book more than 10 times and each time I learn something new. I always find something helpful and useful. It was especially helpful when I was in customer service and had to answer complaint mail, but the wisdom in these pages has also proven valuable in every other job I’ve held and in my relations with others in general. What it boils down to is when I put into practice the principles found in this book life goes easier, and when I don’t it doesn’t. As Carnegie explains, the majority of our success in life depends on our ability to communicate and manage personal relationships effectively whether at home or at work. This book will help you discover and develop the people skills you need to live well and prosper. It is one of the best known motivational books in history and has helped countless people to succeed in both their personal lives and business. It appeals equally to business audiences, self-help audiences, and general readers alike, because Dale Carnegie had an understanding of human nature that will never be outdated. We all can use help in our relationships and this book teaches us how. He addresses the fine art of getting along with people. The core principles of this book, originally written as a practical, working handbook on human relations are proven effective. He explains the fundamentals of handling people with a positive approach, how to make people like you, and how to be the kind of leader who inspires quality work, increased productivity and high morale. He teaches these skills through underlying principles of dealing with people so that they feel important and appreciated. He also emphasizes fundamental techniques for handling people without making them feel manipulated. One of the core ideas in this book is that it is possible to change other people's behavior by changing one's reaction to them. Carnegie says you help people cooperate by seeing the situation from the other person's point of view and "arousing in the other person an eager want." You learn how to make people like you, help people see your way of thinking, and influence people without causing offense or arousing resentment. For instance, "let the other person feel that the idea is his or hers," and "talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person." Carnegie illustrates his points with anecdotes of historical figures, leaders of the business world, and everyday folks which makes it very relatable, interesting and easy to see just how to put the principle he is discussing into practice. I highly recommend this book. It has helped me immeasurably and continues to do so on each new reading of it. I can’t think of anyone it wouldn’t do the same for, everyone should read it. It is a great guide to being a better person while at the same time it is easy to read and follow Dale’s practical guidance. If you are interested in acquiring this book you can find it in the the book store under communication. |
AuthorThe goal of the blog is to provide interesting, motivational, soul feeding material. All to help remind us that God loves us all and wants a personal relationship with each of us and will take care of us in times of trouble. I aspire to be a force for good by providing you with positive input. I encourage you to share the blog with others. Archives
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